"because the man quickest to congratulate himself on his righteous attitudes towards women, is the man most likely to be harming women." You absolutely nailed it here!!!
And when the woman, these kind of men have molded to their every sadistic whim, do what they say, those men get bored ( whether they admit it or not) and that always turns to increased violence against the woman who caved in to them. I hope any girl who first hears a boyfriend say, don’t wear that, or, don’t talk to a friend that happens to be male, that the girl Runs Far Away from that controlling sh*T sadist. Any partner needs to heed that red flag very early!!! Get out!!!!!
I was going to watch the movie Jonah Hill made with his therapist, but never got around to it. But now I wonder: did he say anything about his relationship in the movie? Did his therapist actually help him at all, or just give him the vocabulary to sound like he 'did the work'? That couple therapist sounded like bad news, though.
I saw his movie. Its mostly about his therapist. It touches on his relationship with his mom and how her view of his weight negatively impacted him in his relationships. I felt that the movie was unfinished and lacked a resolution. I honestly was kind of shocked it was released, it didn’t seem done.
I got only a few comments deep on Sarah’s IG posts to know I was not gonna read more of whatever support for Hill that was! The ignorant stanning the malicious. Nope. And it appears the he twisted the language of therapy into coercive control. THAT is some sh^t!!
In my 20s, a handful of my still-attending-church friends were marrying off. And one of them brought a handful of clothes and shoes that her then-fiancée said weren’t modest enough. One pair of high heels, rose gold with a fun zipper up the middle, was dubbed what a hooker would wear. So ... she gave them to me. 👀 <-- Edited to add that I wore those heels all over town with pride, and we had a great time.
She wasn’t the only one who had a lot of obeying to do when she got engaged. I used to joke (with a twang of pain in my stomach) that I should mass produce a kitchen decor sign that said “Submit” in cursive letters. Might still be a million dollar idea, just put the number to a crisis hotline on the back.
This idea of women needing to disappear to be loved has been aching in my bones for a long, long time. Even outside the church walls, men know we are powerful and they can’t quite handle it.
I was in the consecrated life in the Cath. church, the branch that includes nuns and monks. A member of the men’s branch of my former community runs a school. He showed us pictures, and with their strong girls’ basketball team commented that he didn’t like it that the girls were playing sports, because he didn’t find it feminine.
I have dated many men who LOVE that I am independent and not clingy....until they realize that I am independent and don't NEED them. Then, the independence is a negative and I open up their future to try to force another woman to submit to their will.
"because the man quickest to congratulate himself on his righteous attitudes towards women, is the man most likely to be harming women." You absolutely nailed it here!!!
I am sorry you know this to be true too! I hate that we all have so much experience with this. (And thank you!)
Thank you for writing this piece, and for all you do, Meg!!! Xoxox
I had a great therapist, fortunately! My then- husband quit after one session. No "pineapples"!
And when the woman, these kind of men have molded to their every sadistic whim, do what they say, those men get bored ( whether they admit it or not) and that always turns to increased violence against the woman who caved in to them. I hope any girl who first hears a boyfriend say, don’t wear that, or, don’t talk to a friend that happens to be male, that the girl Runs Far Away from that controlling sh*T sadist. Any partner needs to heed that red flag very early!!! Get out!!!!!
Yes, once a woman appears to be completely subjugated, they lose interest. Exactly.
I was going to watch the movie Jonah Hill made with his therapist, but never got around to it. But now I wonder: did he say anything about his relationship in the movie? Did his therapist actually help him at all, or just give him the vocabulary to sound like he 'did the work'? That couple therapist sounded like bad news, though.
I saw his movie. Its mostly about his therapist. It touches on his relationship with his mom and how her view of his weight negatively impacted him in his relationships. I felt that the movie was unfinished and lacked a resolution. I honestly was kind of shocked it was released, it didn’t seem done.
“And because her flesh mortifies him, she is punished even she complies.“
Harsh truth.
💚💚💚
I got only a few comments deep on Sarah’s IG posts to know I was not gonna read more of whatever support for Hill that was! The ignorant stanning the malicious. Nope. And it appears the he twisted the language of therapy into coercive control. THAT is some sh^t!!
In my 20s, a handful of my still-attending-church friends were marrying off. And one of them brought a handful of clothes and shoes that her then-fiancée said weren’t modest enough. One pair of high heels, rose gold with a fun zipper up the middle, was dubbed what a hooker would wear. So ... she gave them to me. 👀 <-- Edited to add that I wore those heels all over town with pride, and we had a great time.
She wasn’t the only one who had a lot of obeying to do when she got engaged. I used to joke (with a twang of pain in my stomach) that I should mass produce a kitchen decor sign that said “Submit” in cursive letters. Might still be a million dollar idea, just put the number to a crisis hotline on the back.
This idea of women needing to disappear to be loved has been aching in my bones for a long, long time. Even outside the church walls, men know we are powerful and they can’t quite handle it.
I was in the consecrated life in the Cath. church, the branch that includes nuns and monks. A member of the men’s branch of my former community runs a school. He showed us pictures, and with their strong girls’ basketball team commented that he didn’t like it that the girls were playing sports, because he didn’t find it feminine.
Even then I was stunned.
I have dated many men who LOVE that I am independent and not clingy....until they realize that I am independent and don't NEED them. Then, the independence is a negative and I open up their future to try to force another woman to submit to their will.
Being WANTED isn't enough for them.
Thank you for writing this.
Thank you, Meg. Your title of this great piece is not lost on me and its familiarity from a “certain” LDS talk given back in 2017 👏🏽